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The following are examples of what I have come to expect from the Republican party over the last 12 years:
GWB before the crash in '08? True American Hero (tm).
GWB after the crash in '08? RINO (tm).
Iraq War? Liberal's fault.
9/11? Liberal's fault.
DADT repeal? Terrorists win.
Terrorsts: ACLU
Michele Bachmann? Perfectly reasonable.
Sarah Palin? Smartest lady alive.
Vaccines? Commie plot to kill your children.
Birth Control? Abstinence only.
Birth Control Pill? Commie plot to kill your unborn children.
Gay Rights: Pfft, queers.
Hate Group: Any group that exposes Hate Groups
KKK? Liberal myth; they don't exist.
New Black Panther Party? Watching your house at night and on every block by the dozens.
Science? Liberal, satanist, commie plot to kill your children's children with the fires of the rapture.
Season's Greetings: War on Christmas.
War on Christmas: Stubbornly acknowledging any religion other than mainstream Christianity from September to December every year.
Bill of Rights: Second Amendment.
Second Amendment: the right to be armed with any weapon you can conceive of at all times, regardless of where you are or what your criminal/psychological/medical background is with no oversight or regulation whatsoever.
Freedom of Religion: Freedom to be a neo-con christian or to shut the hell up about religion.
Not for Profit Charity: any group that seeks to lower corporate taxes
UNICEF: Commie plot to steal money from real Americans and give it to commie terrorists.
United Nations: Commies.
Commies: Anyone even marginally to the political left of Dick Cheney.
Diplomacy: Do what Jesus would do... threaten to drop nukes and murder their entire civilization.
Leaving America Defenseless: Decommission even one vessel out of a Navy that is larger than all the other Navies in the whole damn world put together.
Fiscal Responsibility when a Democrat is the president: Slash taxes, slash spending.
Fiscal Responsiblity when a Republican is the president: Who cares, god is winning! YAY!
Electric Car: commie plot to destroy the oil industry and American values.
American Values: See latest GOP talking points memo.
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The following were provided by Dr. Truth:
pro-choice: Letting the woman choose between pregnant and barefoot and pregnant
marriage equality: Choosing a wife for her looks, money, or political reasons is equal to marrying a woman you love
democracy: a dirty commie plot
Sounds like the GOP to me.
